There is a lot to this thing called marriage. We must know what God's view on marriage is. To do this we need to have a few things. The first is the bible, the second is an open heart and mind, the third is questions. Let's go through scripture together to understand this mystery called marriage.
Gen 2:24 24Therefore shall a man leave his father
and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
Marriage is a joining of two people. The two join in such a way that they become one. This is not just talking about physical joining though. To understand what it means we have to understand that God is three in one Himself.
Marriage is an image of God. Not only that but it is an image of God's relationship with us. So we can learn how our relationship with God should be through our marriage and we can learn how our relationship with our spouse should be through our relationship with God.
Ephesians 5:21-33 21Submitting yourselves one to another
in the fear of God. 22Wives, submit yourselves unto
your own husbands, as unto the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of
the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the
body. 24Therefore as the church is
subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. 25Husbands, love your wives, even
as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; 26That he might sanctify and
cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, 27That he might present it to
himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but
that it should be holy and without blemish. 28So ought men to love their wives
as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. 29For no man ever yet hated his
own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: 30For we are members of his body,
of his flesh, and of his bones. 31For this cause shall a man leave
his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be
one flesh. 32This is a great mystery: but I
speak concerning Christ and the church. 33Nevertheless let every one of
you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she
reverence her husband.
The joining of man and wife is the same as the joining of Christ and the church according to these verses. These verses show us what God's view of marriage is. These show us what our marriage should look like.
So how does Christ and the church look?
The church submits to His authority.
Christ cares how the church feels and considers their weakness.
The church speaks no ill of Christ.
Christ calls the church "the light of the world". (Imagine calling your wife that!)
The church helps in fulfilling the dream of Christ (bringing salvation to the world).
Christ empowers the church and encourages it.
There are so many other ways that we can think of. It is good for the wife to understand her role by knowing what the church is to Christ and the husband should know his role by knowing what Christ is to the church.
This is the way God views marriage.
How can two become one
If you think about it this is not as hard to understand as you may think. Two becoming one does not just mean physically. We each have three parts to us.
Mind
Body
Soul
Each of these three parts make one. Why? Because they all agree with each other. The soul and mind develop the plan and the body walks according to it.
Lets look at God and the church for a moment. When you get saved God lives inside of you. This is not physical, it is spiritual. Your mind is renewed and transformed to follow God's mind. Your soul desires His desires. Your body is a living sacrifice as He sacrificed Himself for us.
I hope you can understand this. The bible says two can not walk together except they agree. If your bodies are one but your mind and soul are not in agreement then you are not walking together.
Marriage is two people who share their mind, body, and soul. Fornication is the sharing of just the body. Therefore you must be in harmony in every one of these three areas. That is why submission and authority is important. Because even if you disagree on something you can still walk together with one following and one leading.
Sometimes we have to say "Not my will but yours" to our spouse.
Why does God want people to marry
1 Corinthians 7:1-2 1Now concerning the things whereof ye
wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. 2Nevertheless, to avoid
fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own
husband.
It does not mean you are weak to want marriage. Jesus Himself said that some should not marry and some should. Even in verse 7 of this same chapter we read that marriage is a gift. In fact the bible also says he who finds a wife is blessed by God.
Marriage was intended to be a symbol of our relationship to God. We were created with a desire to share ourselves just as God wants to share Himself with us. This is the purpose of marriage.
What is the commitment of marriage
Nothing is as strong as the commitment of marriage. God's view of this is very plain to see in that He said "What God has joined together let no man separate."
According to the bible only two things can break this bond. One is adultery, the other is death.
This is a very serious commitment we enter into. So much so that God says if you divorce your wife and marry another you commit adultery. But what about an emotional affair and things like that?
Remember that marriage is two becoming one in ALL three areas. In order to join someone you must leave what you have been attached to in the first place. That is why the bible says "If an unbelieving spouse departs the believing is under no bondage to them in such cases."
What about marital abuse, neglect, and such?
Sadly this happens far too often. So much so that a wife may commit adultery just to get out of the marriage! It was never Gods plan for someone to hurt you. This is not what marriage looks like. Ask yourself this question: Am I one with them?
Does your mind match theirs? I doubt your mind plans how to beat you.
Does your soul match theirs? I doubt your soul desires to be attacked by them.
Does your body match them? I somehow doubt you are really freely giving your body to them because you want to.
If none of these things are in effect that means one thing. You are not joined together! If it started out good but ended up this way then the person who does the abuse has already left the other. You are in no bondage in such case.
These are only a small sample of God's view on marriage.
